A Bumpier Ride

Today has been a pretty tough day in the Extreme Mum House. Well actually, just a rough couple of hours this morning, then the rest of the day has been spent reliving the awfulness of those rough hours, as is usually the case.

My boy had a very public, loud and violent meltdown, resulting in yours truly looking like I have had a couple of rounds with Mike Tyson.
And lost. Twenty minutes later, he was back to his jolly self, had forgotten about it and moved on with his life.
However, I’m still in shock and pretty traumatised by the whole horrible episode.
Tomorrow will be another day I’m sure, all the old clichés, take it one day at a time, it’s the only way to live….blah blah blah.

Sometimes you just want to throw all these sentiments out of the window and get angry.
Other days you are that Special Needs Supermum that can do it all, manage all the stuff and roll with the punches.
Literally, in my case. But, most of all, you just want NORMAL.
Some days, I just crave normal. But normal is something that can never happen in our house.
You have to redefine normal. For all your family.
That isn’t easy. On days like today, all you can see around you are normal families doing normal things and not being faced with the challenges you’ve had to face.
And that really eats you up.

Other days, it’s actually quite good not being normal.
It’s fun. You can internally laugh at others getting stressed about random stuff that really does not matter.
You embrace your funny little family and being different.
You are a glowing advocate for Disability Awareness.
You tell the world about your child’s autism and how it has been the making of you and how much he has to offer the world.

But on both of these types of days, you still love your child.
That doesn’t change. But the ups and downs, the highs and lows are exhausting: waking up each morning and not knowing which way it’s going to fall.

You could say this is true of mainstream parenting – of course it is.
We also have two daughters, so I am speaking from experience.
However, with a child with Special Needs, the highs are higher and the lows are lower.
It’s definitely a bumpier ride.

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